We're like a lot better than the average bears
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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