That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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