Nicole vs. Life
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Randomize