I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Randomize
