He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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