Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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