I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
