how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
