some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
