Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
