found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize