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Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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