Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I just forgot I was standing up.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Randomize
