Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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