We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I forgot how hot balto sounded
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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