He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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