god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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