Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize