Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Randomize
