I wish my penis had an off switch
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
