she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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