All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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