i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
