Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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