so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
