But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I skipped work to stalk him.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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