dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
