my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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