He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
