I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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