Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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