Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
I'm really busy with my period
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