STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Randomize
