dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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