dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Randomize
