Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize