Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
