She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
