so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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