Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
