I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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