i don't like sucking hair
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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