My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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