Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
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