I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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