Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
