Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i think i have herpe
just one?
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
