shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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