I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Randomize
