People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
